Frawley Coaching

Mindset Matters: Four Ways to Keep Your Head in the Game 10/20/23

10/30/23

We’re fast approaching the release of the online resource website and I couldn’t be more excited! Over the past several months I’ve been filming the Ignite and Fundamentals series as well as new classes that I think would be most helpful to agents as they’re starting out. As I’ve been building it, I’ve been adding things that have been suggested to me over the years that agents might find helpful as they hit the gas on their new real estate careers. This includes classes about mindset and safety as well as actual timelines for the seller/buyer experience and contract to close processes. 

One thing that we don’t talk about enough in real estate is that this business is nearly as much of a head game as it is one of action. This week I’ve been writing and filming a class about mindset, and I want to share an overview of it with you.

Below is an outline for how to keep your mindset straight in life and business.

Listen folks. This isn’t a pep talk, this is a practice.

Having a healthy mindset is so powerful at any stage of our life, especially when we’re doing something we’ve never done before. Our noodle is at it’s best when we it’s not ladden with fear, doubt, and negativity.

How can we combat the urge to go to the darkside, though? 

I’ve found that self-awareness really is half the battle. Below are four ways to keep your head on straight and in the game in life and business. 

 

TACTIC ONE: ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR JOURNEY

Clarity is power, and it is virtually impossible to get to our destination without first knowing where our feet are right now. Be honest with yourself. Find your areas of opportunity. Where can you grow?

Explore your goals and align them with your values. What is your Big Why? Know your unique Value Proposition. Know your Economic Model. Visit your 4-1-1 every day. If you’re so fresh in the business that you don’t know what these things are, rest assured, you’ll be learning about them soon enough.

Look in the mirror and ask yourself: am I doing what I need to do to reach my goal? Be honest. BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF.

If the answer is no, don’t get down on yourself. Get to work.

TACTIC TWO: ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR GRATITUDE

A classic BOLD Law states that what we focus on expands. Have you ever bought a new car and suddenly that’s the kind of car you see everywhere on the road? Your brain is focused on the new car and so it subconsciously seeks that car whenever it can. 

The same goes for positivity. If we get out of bed with a crappy attitude, that negativity will manifest other negativity. Conversely, if we actively engage our brains to seek out things that bring us joy and reasons that we’re grateful, we can actually train our brain to seek and find positive things. 
If you’re not already in the practice of sending notes of gratitude or keeping a gratitude journal, I encourage you to start. Tell people when they’re awesome. Write glowing reviews for small businesses. Jot down things that make your heart happy. I promise you’ll see a beautiful  perspective shift. 

TACTIC THREE: ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR LIMITING BELIEFS

Self doubt is the poison of growth. I can’t tell you to stop doubting yourself much like I can’t tell you to not imagine a pink elephant. You can’t control those first thoughts. What you CAN control, though, is the thought that comes after it. Being aware that you’re doubting yourself is a mental awakening and a game changer. 
Case in point.  The last time I deep cleaned my oven I was 8 months pregnant with Odie and in a genuinely obsessive nesting moment. I disassembled the doors to scour in between the glass and it took me several hours to figure out how to get all the pieces back together again. Did you know there were so many layers of glass in an oven door?? I digress…

Last weekend I hyper-fixated on deep-cleaning my oven again. (I know you’re riveted– hang on). I busted out the big guns and used power tools to scour the inside of the box, under the burners, and around the inside of the glass. I then grabbed a screwdriver and started deconstructing the mechanism that stands between our frozen pizzas and burning my house down. An hour later every little screw and corner was positively spotless, and I then had to put it back together again. I tried. I tried and failed. Another hour of trial and error and I was working myself up to nearly paralyzing frustration. I paced. I cursed. I threw things. I nearly gave up and started shopping for a new oven. But then I remembered: I’ve done this before. I can do it again. 

It was like a switch flipped in my brain. It was like I was a professional oven builder and this was my art. I don’t know how it happened and it quite honestly could have been magic. Angels were singing. Somehow my fingers grabbed the right screws and placed them in the right holes. Somehow my hands managed to squeeze the glass panes in between those obnoxiously narrow slots that hold them intact. Somehow I pieced the whole dang mechanism back together again, remarkably within five minutes of remembering that I’ve done it before and I can do it again.  Absolutely nuts. 
So if you ever catch yourself feeling hopeless, feel free to think of me throwing a screwdriver across my garage and then having that epiphany. If it’s been done before, even if it hasn’t been done by you, it can be done again.
The hardest part of all of this is being aware that you’re actually having a limiting belief. 

TACTIC FOUR: ACKNOWLEDGE WHEN YOU NEED HELP

Sometimes we’re in over our heads, and that’s okay. You may have recently gotten your real estate license, and if that’s the case, please know that nobody expects you to be the Yoda of the industry. It’s okay to not know something. 

Likewise, someone might need help outside of business and it’s important to be aware of that, too. You can’t tell a depressed person to cheer up. You can’t tell an anxious person to calm down. You can’t tell someone with ADHD to focus. 

Know where your tools are. Know where your support is. Be okay with not having it all figured out. 

Seek help form a leader, coach, or mentor if you have questions or need guidance in business. You are not Atlas and the world is on all of our shoulders, not just yours. Don’t be afraid of therapy if that’s what your brain needs.  There are so many resources through your GP or even online like Better Help or Talkspace. 

So if you need a little or a lot of support, acknowledge it. Then seek it out. 

 

 

I hope you find these ramblings helpful. I genuinely care about you and I want you to see the potential in yourself that I know is there. If you ever find you are at a loss for faith, please know you may always borrow mine. I believe in you.

 

 

As always, it is an honor and a privilege to be in business with each and every one of you.  

Best,

Coach Lins

 

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